Residents of all ages were in shock and utter disbelief on Sunday because one of the biggest beating hearts in our community stopped too soon.
A drive down Bridge Avenue will never be the same for some because a little part of a lot of people who loved Darren Arms died with him this week. I know because it happened to me.
There are no words to describe this moment or mood in our town, so allow me to describe this amazing friend to Point Pleasant.
Darren Arms, 50, showed us by example what the definition of a real "FAN" is. This husband, father, brother, son, friend, successful local businessman, fan of local kids and "his" New York Giants would say, "Your day, week and year can only get better if you make it your business to be a fan of someone or something! Who are we celebrating today?!" Darren didn't just say it; he lived this tenet by simply being himself.
The "Darren Stories" getting shared block-by-block right now are fantastic and humbling! One memory seems more remarkable than the next including the Jan 14th post on the Point Pleasant Patch that mentions the quiet generosity Darren showed residents in Sunshine Harbor when he arrived with a truck full of cooked food during Superstorm Sandy recovery efforts.
Yes, this one singular example does a great job describing the Darren so many of us knew for decades. Many thanks to the neighbor who shared it!
Darren's gorgeous and gifted wife Lisa grew up east of the railroad tracks on Forman Avenue right up the street from where I lived during my teenage years in Point Beach.
She would become my younger sister's, Maggie Zuhowski's, best friend. It was Lisa who led me to Colonial Ranch Market 28 years ago!
I'd show up with my own bowls and pans in hand in a hysterical attempt to fool my then-boyfriend Harry into thinking I was a really great cook! I couldn't cook or bake to save my life and so Darren and our families would scream with laughter over what happened next.
He, his beautiful late mother, Mary, and wonderful dad, Lenny, filled my pans to the rim with the special of the day and everybody's favorite red potato salad. Before I left the store I'd pull out a sliced egg, parsley and some paprika so I could claim Darren's delicious creations as my own at my next destination.
One day the gig was up! We were all at an Elk's event catered in part by Colonial Market and the secret was out - Darren Arms' potato salad tasted just like Aunt Tish Ferguson's! LOL - I was caught!
Fortunately, what I learned from this experience is that talented entrepreneurs who love to cater love customers who cannot cook so it was easy for me to become a loyal repeat customer of Colonial Ranch Market and Darren Arms for the rest of my life!!
Darren affectionately dubbed me "Tish-the-Catered Dish;" the Arms children would adopt me as their honorary "Aunt" and I'd dance through life with two titles to cherish. Oh and I'm happy to report Harry Ferguson married me AND Darren Arms' cooking in 1986 and we all lived happily ever after. That was until Sunday…
For 28 years every single engagement, christening, anniversary, birthday, fundraiser, Irish Celebration on the Point Beach Boardwalk, house warming party, retirement celebration, motorized float party, Halloween salute, multi-state bus trip, & Idle Hour Giants Road trip were bolstered by Darren's positive energy and unforgettable feasts created and shared with perfection.
Every effort represented the highest form of love of family, friends, sports and community which made every event more enjoyable.
How do we plan another celebration or gathering without the big guy on Bridge Avenue who taught us how to leverage food to help people recover, see light in the middle of darkness, enhance their celebration and raise awareness to important causes?
Darren grew up knowing that a focus on the stomach could leave any heart feeling full. Between 1995 and 1998 when my husband and I moved our family to Bayonne to be closer to our jobs in New York City, Darren Arms packed up trays of his homemade Colonial Ranch specials and delivered them to us 50 miles away during the Christmas Holiday.
This man took time from a business high season to make sure a homesick friend wouldn't feel too far removed from the wonders of Point Pleasant - that place we all called home no matter where our lives had taken us.
With tears flowing freely this week, I can tell you that this one act-of-kindness was the most precious and thoughtful Christmas gift I ever received. I'll never forget it.
Former Point Boro football players who are now grown men cried Sunday for Darren Arms and for his family and for a very good reason. They respected Darren because he worked to keep them motivated and inspired at every turn when they were kids.
For more than two decades these student athletes started their Thanksgiving and Championship Game Weekends at the business Darren and the Arms Family built. A barbeque celebrating excellence was on the menu every time! The definition of community spirit and caring lived inside this guy with the tough exterior, rip-roaring sense of humor, and heart of gold.
Darren was a hard-driving community servant with a remarkable old-school work ethic who insisted on no headlines, no billing or recognition or credit or mention of his name as he stood quietly & firmly and consistently behind Point Pleasant Borough High School All-Sport Boosters, Black & Gold events, graduation awards ceremonies, homecoming parades, the Elk's, sports fundraisers in all forms.
He was that man - the fan for all seasons with respect for people of all ages. You knew he loved his family, local kids, football, his community, country and life itself because those messages were etched in his glorious smile and hardy laugh; only to be outdone by the magnificent sparkle in his eyes! That's the man we knew behind our meat counter and the dear friend we're left to miss for the rest of our lives.
If you were lucky enough to be part of his inner circle or simply someone who honored his life's work by becoming a regular customer at his store, I can tell you this - Darren Arms appreciated you! The ultra-quiet legacy of giving back was Darren's way of thanking all those individuals and local businesses that supported the dreams, goals and successes of his dad former Point Pleasant Mayor Lenny Arms, his incredible mother Mary and his entire family.
Blessed are the parents who raise a son like Darren who grows up driven to honor his community in their name. No parent or community could ask for more.
Maggie Hart-Zuhowski
11:17 am on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Great Tribute Tish!!!! You have an amazing gift. Love ya
Jennifer Enright
11:42 am on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
A beautiful tribute to a man who will be missed and remembered. RIP Darren and thanks for all you did for your community over the years.
Denise Feeney
12:04 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Your words are incredible and so true. I find my self at times with no words to describe the lost of this sweet man. My heart goes out to his family may they find some comfort from friends and family and believe God will take care of Darren.
pd
12:16 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Wow.
Brianne Diomede
12:54 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Rest in Peace, Darren~ Your kindness to our family and the Boro was seen shining through all the little grocery stops, baby showers, funeral masses, and hurricanes- and Kindness is the best thing to be remembered for.... Shine on.... Our hugs and good thoughts go out to the Arms family and all who love him....
Michelle Bernabe Ebeid
12:56 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Beautifully said Trish. Darren will always be remembered as such a wonderful man by all who had the honor of knowing him,
Colleen Blake
1:18 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
every word is so true, and every memory of him brings a tear to me. He was a true HOMETOWN HERO
Larry Kyse
1:19 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
My wife and I live at the shore 4 months a year for the past 3 years. A neighbor recommended we try the Colonial Market for quality meats. The butcher shop was outstanding and as a bonus we found all the departments to be outstanding. I would wear a sports team tee shirt and Darren and I would engage in conversation about sports when I came in. The last time was in December when I stopped in to stock up on meat after working on my shore house, we had a great conversation about one of his former favorite teams, the New Jersey Nets. Darren was always friendly and willing to talk, he passed on his philsophies to all his employees in that I have never encountered anyone who was not helpful, friendly and grateful for the business.
Colleen Blake
1:52 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
i would also like to mention that because of his generosity to the football team thruout the years During the 2009-2010 season the Black & Gold Parents Club chose to Honor Darren by presenting him with a replica of the Jersey he wore when he played Football for the Panthers. I was glad to be a part of that presentation along with Kris Bongiovi.He was truly a big part of the Panther Brotherhood.
Cynthia Youngman
5:16 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
I parked across the street from Colonial last night and just looked at the storefront. My place to go on my way home from work to feel my family their delicious treats. I too would always thank Darren for cooking for me. :) I couldn't walk in there last night. I would miss him too much. I think we will all have to heal as a community together. Thank you Trish for putting this great man into beautiful words. Heaven is a better place now that he is there.
Horse mom
5:26 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
The most beautiful tribute , as the tears roll down my face reading it , you put into words exactly who Darren was to many , no celebration or even sad times did not got without Darren's and the Ranch being a part of it , I am happy Christmas Eve I was able to pick up my families food and say hello to Darren, he was so busy but he stopped to talk to me and ask how my family were doing , I will forever miss his smile , thank you so much for you words and I know Darren would shake his head as if to say that is not me , he was a man that did things from his heart without expecting anything in return
Al Romanelli
6:50 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Trisha that was beautiful,he was a fine man and a great neighbor to me and my wife
Jennifer Pulsinelli
8:04 pm on Tuesday, January 15, 2013
What a beautiful eulogy to an incredible man! It's true heaven is a better place with him there! I will miss him terribly! Our celebrations will not be the same without him! Rest in peace Darren.
Lisa A. O'Brien
12:20 pm on Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Thanks for putting into words what the rest of us are feeling!! A huge hole has been left in our community!! He will be greatly missed by many!!
Holly Haugh Ricci
9:57 pm on Wednesday, January 16, 2013
As always, Tish, your words paint a heart-warming, eloquent picture that leaves everyone who reads them a little bit richer. Darren....your kind words, genuine caring, and uplifting spirit have enriched the lives of me and my family over the years. The hug you went out of your way to give my Mom just days ago, meant more than you could know. You touched many people....and will be greatly missed.
Rob Haugh
12:24 am on Saturday, January 19, 2013
God bless. RIP Darren You will surely be missed!! Very well put Tish! Warmest regards to Friends, Family, & Community.
Bob Herbst
2:23 pm on Saturday, January 19, 2013
Tish,
Oh my God, what a beautiful tribute to Darren, I think the tears have just destroyed my keyboard!
Test in Peace my brother!
Bob Herbst