"Tis Himself" John Conaghan Celebrates his 88th St. Patrick's Day!

Irish Fiddler and wood carving master "Tis Himself" John Conaghan of Point Pleasant is my second cousin. And this weekend he is at home celebrating his 88th St. Patrick's Day with his wife of 65 years - Aunt Nonnie Conaghan.     

The Irish eyes of our family are smiling with great joy because Uncle John's passion for music, art, singing and hand-crafted instruments has kept us inspired as we've worked tirelessly to build our lives in America.

Our family's history in the United States was launched by brave and strong people during difficult times. "Uncle John," which is how we address him, is my mom's eldest first cousin who traveled across the Atlantic Ocean at the age of 5.  

He arrived in New York on a ship from Donegal, Ireland with his mom - the extraordinary Grace Conaghan - and baby sister, Cecilia (Mellett). They joined Grace's sisters - my maternal grandmother, Margaret Sharkey, and great aunt, Mary Stroh - in the land of opportunity and made their home in Bayonne.

We now find ourselves one hundred and eighty-nine first and second cousins down this road and our beloved patriarch and his beautiful wife - a dedicated nurse for 50-plus years - continue to teach lessons executed "by example."  

We learned the meaning of courage, hard work, loyalty, friendship and respect for others because Uncle John and Aunt Nonnie still live these tenets to this very day.

The true meaning of "To have and to hold from this day forward… for better, for worse; in sickness and in health" was the foundation for their partnership and it is the loving time-bound promise to each other still on display today. 

Their relationship and Uncle John's music served as a kind of glue in the lives of many. I know because this glorious second cousin and his Nonnie became two of my very best friends. 

All I ever have to do is sit in their living room and I'm comforted and embraced by the ceremony and tradition that is our family.  An unconditional moment does not get better than this.

The oldest of nine children, Uncle John enlisted in the U.S. Navy in his late teens. This proud veteran of World War II served part of his tour on board the U.S.S. Tillman DD# 641. It was a remarkable journey that took him around the world and trained him in many trades as he fought for freedom on behalf of his adopted homeland.

He shared these stories with us often because his love for America and the opportunity she gave him and our family was never lost on him. 

We turned out in force along the parade route a few years ago when Point Pleasant honored him as a Grand Marshal on Memorial Day. They celebrated his service and commitment to country. As he waved to the crowds from the backseat of a little blue car, it was his smile that made us dance with pride.

Uncle John was a former Sand-Hog who helped dig and build several of the traffic tunnels leading in and out of New York City. He was in the housing and construction business for over 40 years.

When he retired from that, he transferred his great skills and many gifts to his "First Love" - music and instrument building!  

Over the past 22 years, he has hand-carved over 75 fiddles and other instruments. Since he was five years old, he has taught himself how to play every musical instrument that ever interested him.  

The hand-crafted Bodhram (Irish single-skin cylindrical drum) made just for me and signed by him in 2009 is the reminder that will keep the beat that is his music at my back for the rest of my life.   

He has been recognized from one end of New Jersey to the other as a "Man of Excellence." He and his sons, Michael and Patrick Conaghan, formed an Irish band in the early years and they've been delighting audiences and generations of our family at festivals ever since.  

The band played on and 'our' Fiddler shined to the delight of close friends in North Jersey just this afternoon.

We learned from watching Uncle John that a positive attitude was clearly "the key" if you expected to scale and/or beat challenges ranging from the worst-of-times to life-threatening illnesses. Because of him our whole family can tell you taht anything is actually possible. 

His greatest lessons were the ones he lived including: No matter what's happening, try to live with the music of a fiddler in your heart! Become a fan of someone or something and watch how your own passion propels your life forward! 

In 1963, Uncle John was 40-years old when cancer struck, he had four children at home and was told he had six months to live. At age 75, new illness hit; it was 1998 and there was no chance he'd make it home from the hospital.

At age 86, we were witness to another miracle as he played the fiddle he had just 'hand-carved' to celebrate St. Patrick's Day and his latest recovery!

Uncle John once told me that when he sang on the radio in Jersey City at age 7, he was too young to realize that "once artists use their gifts to lift the hearts of others, the musician's blessing lasts a lifetime."  

A few years ago, he told me he knew that playing his fiddles and violins often placed him close to the face of God and that he was grateful for that.    

We celebrated Uncle John's 88th birthday on Christmas Day and a few hints of a slowdown were caught in the glow of the lights that decorated our family tree, but…  

Last week when I congratulated him on his 88th St. Patrick's Day, he smiled back at me, picked up his home-made four-stringed instrument and a slender stick with horsehairs and played the most incredible song I ever heard.